Friday, August 31, 2012

Held Captive

I lay still in my bed, hearing his footsteps:
terrified creaking down teh stairs I hear, seconds later the moment I
dread. I pretend to be sleeping with my eyes closed tight, my nightmare
has come all over again.
I hear you stop at the foot of my bed -- right about now I am wishing I
was dead! You move your hands over me as I drift to a place that does
not exist, a place where I am just a child, a place with no fear, a
place with no pain.
I feel your body as it presses into mine.
My breath is taken from my chest.
I am well aware this won't be the last.
You achieve your goals, then leave.
What have I done, I'm left all alone.
The tears roll down my face.
Please, please just get me outta this place.
The years have gone by and I wanna believe the monsters will never
hurt me again, I pray, and pray, never again, yet in one moment my guard
I let down once again. This familiar stranger, I let in, with my eyes
closed my nightmare begins. I know in my heart it's not gonna end.. His
hands are on me, my clothes on the floor. I cry and cry but I'm a scared
little coward who deserves much more. I've become his whore as his body
becomes one with mine. Something in me dies, this little girl will be
the same no more.
My mind holds a pile of memories that I wish I could burn. That will not
happen; it haunts me at night. Once my eyes close my nightmares begin.
My reality becomes misery, but I give it my all. I've been imprisoned,
the voices around me preach on and on "It's over, now time to move on",
trying to convince me there is no shame. I try to forget yet once again
the nightmares begin. It'll never be over; it'll simply start over again. 
 
-- anonymous

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